How often do you get into an argument and think of the perfect comeback … three days later? To take down your opponent, tired vocabulary will not suffice. That comeback has to be spectacular. Confuse and conquer your foes with your linguistic wit; here are some words to keep on the tip of your tongue the next time you’re caught in conflict. Don’t forget to follow your verbal take-down with your mama’s advice: just walk away!


“Zoilist” comes from the name Zoilus. And who was Zoilus? He was one of Homer’s biggest critics. Yes, that Homer, the author of The Iliad and The Odyssey. Fittingly, a “zoilist” is a bitter and baseless critic. At least your critic won’t be able to criticize your vocabulary.


A “grumbletonian” is exactly what it sounds like. These people grumble all the time and can’t stop complaining. Their complaints often relate to political affairs. Maybe you’ll have a few grumbletonians at Thanksgiving dinner this year.

Addle-pated Dildo

Try not to picture the former prez/social influencer when you spout this word to an offender… heck, there is no try, as Yoda suggested. One wonders if he’ll return to the highest office in the land, as his QAnon disciples predict?


This word first popped up in the late 19th century amid tumultuous American politics. Yes, the tumult of politics have long been with us – sigh. A “snollygoster” is someone who doesn’t have many moral scruples but is good at getting what they want.


If you’ve heard the term “gasbag,” you know what a “gasser” is. It’s someone who talks forever, even if no one is listening, and usually about themselves. They also have a tendency to brag. So tiresome, they are.


A rumgumptious person is rude and offensive. They’re also pompous and think they know better than you. The phrase dates back to the late 18th century —


A “rakefire” will stay in your house, chatting and eating your food until the house burns down and all that’s left are the ashes. It’s someone who has long overstayed their welcome and probably won’t get the hint that it’s time for them to leave. Though we’ve had a significant amount of houseguests in Casa Colando, none have take up offensive residence.


An ultracrepidarian is probably a snoutband, too. A snoutband constantly interrupts the conversation to tell you how wrong you are. They take pleasure in being argumentative. Your mama’s advice to walk away when you see them approach is best.


“Bobolyne” and “pillock” are synonyms for fool. “Bobolyne” originated with the Tudors – created by one of Henry VIII’s teachers, poet John Skelton. One wonders if that’s what he thought of his royal pupil.